Open letter to online stores

Dear Stores,

Thank you for your response to my letter, I do hope you are well.
Unfortunately my addiction has not quelled and I continue to buy on an almost daily basis.

That aside I'd like to thank you ASOS Curve for your translation of high fashion. Thank you for high street prices and models in sizes that are easier for me to understand.

Thank you forever 21 for listing the dimensions of 1X there are some days you see when I'm closer to 2 I'm glad I know what measurement it is that makes that true!

Thank you Evans for your delivery today, I'm glad it was free after I'd spent £40 On my good deed.

So thank you, thank you thank you. Thanking you once again. My amazon list is more full than ever but I'm planning to be plus sized forever

Yours sincerely,
10page amazon wish lister xxx

P.S Can you see that this stuff goes on sale on payday at 80% off, with free delivery in size 1X/UK18?

:D