The fourth and final agreement.

And finally - the last agreement from Ruiz! Always do your best!

Sounds simple - but it truly helps you get past all of your regrets! Why? Because if at all times you do your best to the best of your knowledge and the best of your ability you can never feel that you wasted time, and you'd also never regret anything.

Let's talk about : Fitness (no groaning now) basically you know when you set in your mind that you're going to the gym 4 days this week for 30mins, and you don't do your best and you only go twice - and goal date edges nearer -and you haven't lost any weight or inches-  all the anxiety - the resulting binge and trash talk in front of the TV, could all be avoided ... If you just went the 4 or even 5 days and felt all prissy and proud of yourself afterward.

Doing less than our best leads to self punishment, shame and frustrations.

Ruiz states too that we should do no more than our best. We shouldn't be exhausted - we just do our best! Don't just labour for an insuperable amount of time- if you could do your best in 2 hrs - then do 2 hrs then put it down don't labour on for 8!

Our best will also vary from day to day and even minute to minute based on our health, state of mind and environment - but once we do our best we need not worry.

So yes - its that simple - always do your best!

"The problem with assumptions is that we believe they are the truth"!

Don't assume anything - Ruiz says "the problem with assumptions is that we believe they are the truth"!

Unfortunately it works like this: we make assumption - we misunderstand - take it personally- react by spreading poison (not being impeccable with our word).

All drama comes from assumptions and gossip (which I quite like calling poison right now) and so what if people are gossiping (about you or otherwise) 1. They are not being impeccable with their word and their words say a wholeeee lot about them and their insecurities and actually not so much about the subject of gossip and 2. You don't have to take it on, gossip dies down - you wouldn't be taking anything personally and it doesn't have to be a part of your "dream".

We also (ruiz points out) have a habit of making things up - and believing them. And when they turn out to be untrue we're upset and devastated. Its important in all areas of our lives not to make assumptions and to obtain clarification.

It seems about a lot of things (I'm particularly guilty) we are afraid of seeking clarification ***just in case*** its not in alignment with our "assumption" or fantasy about what it is. Even in relationships, we're scared of the "where are we going" talk and worry about disclosing the "I'd like a relationship" aspect.
The less we assume- the more peaceful and blissful our dreams can be - our actions will be based on truth not .. Well.. "Fluff"... That we just made... Like, just because ... It was easier than finding the truth at the outset.

So wait how is this relevant to us plus divas? Well esteem is the topic of so many of our posts so it must be an "issue" right.

How many times do we walk into a room (looking the bomb of course) and we think the men are looking at the skinny heiffer over thurr? Don't make assumptions (they're probably looking at you)!!! Don't take it personally (that they're skinny and the men are supposedly looking) and be impeccable with your word - go spread your glory and grace in speaking with some of the men. Some diamonds need to be seen up close to enjoy their true sparkle. ;-).

The first agreement is ... That you should be impeccable with your word.

This is from an inspirational book by ... Don Miguel Ruiz which has 4 agreements.

I think this one is particularly helpful to us, "Its a full time job to reject the messaging that gets heaped upon us about whether or not we look attractive" (how dating is ruining our love lives) now I know that we're a group of serious hot tamale - we don't need the TV or anyone else for that matter to tell us otherwise.

So being impeccable with our word, means we ONLY say positive things, to ourselves and others. Now this takes some practice...

According to Don Miguel - we all have our own dream. This is not what we aspire to, but the existence that we live, we have a set of beliefs about ourselves and the world we live in.  And we grow up to believe that what we're dreaming is real (stay with me- not like the matrix at all).
Have you ever had... When you were young ... A relative or something tell you something negative about yourself and you internalised it and carried it and believed it. Like my gran once told me I'd never be as gorgeous as my mum was because I have too much of my dad in me. Now she said that at 13, this is how wrong she is - 1. If me and my mum stand profile in pictures people think its camera trickery (and that we're one and the same person) 2. Actually the general public  would have me believe that I'm prettier than my mum because people LOVE my lips (that I got from my dad) compared to my mums thinner less pronounced ones.

Ruiz says that whatever they told you, is about them... Not you and its up to you not to take it on (another chapter of the book) but being impeccable with your word means you don't give out any of that poison (ruiz calls it magic) either - not to yourself nor anyone else.

Break the negative projections in your current "dream", and only reinforce the ones that you want in your life...you are in full control of your dream.

It helps at work too, with responding to dissonance. When people write you emails  to what seems like an attempt to deliberately rile you. You become expert at answering the question without emotion and you may even add a little spice by "killing it with kindness".

We're not talking about being smug (although when you kill anything with kindness you can't help but glow at your own nobility) but actual a self proclaimed self assurance of the world around us being a positive place. Even the bible professes to tell us we should live heaven on earth - seems impossible with what is going on - but it simply means a higher level of thought where your faith(s) are maintained by your impeccable word.

This also means an end to gossip, apparently we have modern language to thank gossip for but its continuum must stop here- it is simply poison transfer and we need absolutely no part in it.